Tai Moana Nua

As I've mentioned time after time my pregnancy with Tai was nothing like my pregnancy with Anelia. Well, the same applies to my labor & delivery. Before I begin to share my story please be mindful that this is a birth story, there may a lot of "tmi" moments. I'm also going to provide every detail because I personally want to be able to remember the good, the bad, the ugly & every little thing in between. So here goes...

Tai's due date was on 9/19 & on a Wednesday 9/17 my doctor swept my membranes in hopes to start labor. I was dilated to a 3 & 75% effaced at the time. I was extremely hopeful that this would work because I was so uncomfortable & so anxious to have our baby here.

I went home Wednesday & immediately started having contractions. I went to my in-laws with Sage & Anelia & I walked, skipped, hopped up & down their street. My contractions weren't consistent. At times they were as close as 7 minutes apart & other times they would only come once an hour. Unfortunately, these contractions continued until Saturday & were strongest at night & I was getting very little sleep. Saturday afternoon they were coming every 10 minutes again & they were strong & painful to the point I was in tears. I made the decision to go to the hospital because I couldn't handle another night of no sleep or the pain any longer & I figured the worst thing that could happen was that I'd get sent home. Sage worked grave shift Friday night until 6:00am Saturday morning & was scheduled to work at 6:00 that night. I didn't want to have him come along with me to the hospital & then it be a false alarm so I told him to stay home & sleep for work & I'd go in alone. If they were going to keep me I'd let him know of course. All my bags were packed but I didn't take anything with me other than my purse because I honestly thought I was going to get sent back home.

I left for the hospital at 2:22, I specifically remember that time because as I was getting in the car, I got a contraction. Our hospital is less than 5 minutes from our house so I wasn't worried about contracting while driving. I arrived at the hospital, went to labor & delivery & to my surprise there were at least 20 pregnant couples in the waiting room. I began to panic thinking they all were in labor & that I wasn't going to be able to be seen for a lonnnggg time. As I made my way towards the desk to checkin a woman approached me & asked if I was there for the hospital tour. The lobby full of pregnant women made a lot of sense after that, what a relief.

I approached the desk & let them know I was having very painful contractions. They checked me in & took me to a room to be seen. The nurse checked me & said that I was dilated to a 4 & 100% effaced & that the doctor would most likely be keeping me there. I was so relieved, excited yet nervous... finally, it was time! I texted Sage & let him know to gather everything & head to the hospital. By about 3:30pm we were assigned a new room. Around 4:00, I was settled into my room & they decided to break my water. I asked to get my epidural immediately after because I knew after my water was broken that my contractions would come stronger & faster. 

My water broke naturally with Anelia so I was really nervous to have them do this for me this time around. I was mostly nervous for the pain I was going to feel afterwards. Luckily, the pain wasn't anything worse than I had already been feeling. After getting my epidural I was still feeling the contractions. They weren't extremely painful but the purpose of an epidural is not feel anything, obviously, so I let my nurse know. They gave me a stronger dose of medicine & if that didn't work they'd replace my epidural all together. They said that it may not be working correctly because I'm so tall. I didn't have any issues with my epidural last time, I was actually "too" numb. When they had given me the dose I was at a 7. I continued to feel the pain but the anesthesiologist wasn't able to replace my epidural as they planned because he had a c-section scheduled that he had to go into. He gave me another dose of strong medicine before heading into the c-section that didn't seem to help at all. 

I wasn't upset that the epidural didn't work. I understood that things could go wrong that were out of their control. I didn't plan to have Tai naturally whatsoever but plans change & I am now glad it didn't work because I know I am capable of handling that kind of pain. I had extreme back labor & was in excruciating pain. As Tai descended I could literally feel my hips separating. I don't remember what I was saying as all of this was happening but I definitely was not quiet lol! I wasn't screaming or swearing but I remember yelling & crying when each contraction hit. I wasn't able to track time at all, I have no idea how long it took for me to get to a 10 because the entire time I was just trying to focus on getting through each contraction. 

Before I continue I failed to mention who was all there for the birth. Sage, my mother-in-law, Heavenly, my sister-in-laws, Tawny & Ciera & one of my best friends, Bridget were all there during my delivery. I'm so thankful for all of them, as I dealt with the pain they talked me through it & encouraged me. I remember becoming really emotional as the pain got stronger & wishing my mom was there. Moms just have a way of easing pain with words of comfort & I wished with everything that my mom could have been there in those tough, painful moments.

My mom & siblings all sent me texts of reassurance as well & prayed for me throughout my delivery. It was rough at first not having anyone from my family there but I know that if they could have come, they would have. I am thankful for those who were there though, I don't know what I would have done without them all.

I finally reached a 10 & my contractions were back to back, it was time to push. I again have no idea how long I was pushing. The doctor who delivered Tai was Dr. Tineta. He was awesome & really guided me through pushing. When I struggled to get the hang of pushing he gave me a towel & basically played tug-of-war with me. It was different but a good kind of different. Instead of getting frustrated with me he came up a way to help me. As I was pushing I continuously asked if Tai was okay. With Ane she became stressed as I was pushing because the cord was around her neck so this time I wanted to ensure Tai was always doing okay.

After over 3 days of early labor & 6 hours of hard, painful labor at the hospital, our sweet baby girl Tai Moana Nua arrived at 8:13pm on September 20, 2014.  She weighed 7 pounds, 10 ounces & was 20 inches long. She is perfect! I was so thrilled that was able to hold her right away because I wasn't able to do that with Anelia. 

Tai has been an amazing baby thus far. I'm really surprised how alert she already is at almost 3 weeks. She is already starting to try to hold her head up during tummy time & she's tracking things with her eyes. Her doctor says she's ahead of schedule in doing those things which makes me a proud mommy.

I'll update at a later time how we've adjusted to having two & I hope to update more often as well.

Xo, 

Proud mommy of two amazing blessings

9/19/2014

Well, our due date is here & after multiple false alarms I'm feeling tired, impatient, but most of all, ready to meet our baby girl.

I feel like I've done all I can to get things going...

I've ate spicy foods & pineapple til my tongue burned & my mouth hurt.

I've drank raspberry leaf tea until it was basically coming out of my nose.

I have danced as if no one was watching, thankfully nobody was but I probably would have gotten an award for best running man & hip shaking while pregnant, just saying.

I have walked or shall I say waddled, galloped, skipped for miles in the heat of the desert because lets be real, Vegas is still scorching hot after the sun has gone down.

I have hopped, lunged, crab walked, & squatted up & down the stairs.

I've bounced & rolled on my birthing ball while enjoying my favorite tv shows.

Ladies & gentlemen, I've basically done it ALL & yet nothing has worked.  These old wives tales have not been effective at all.

On Wednesday afternoon I had my second membrane sweep.  At that time I was 3 cm dilated & 75% effaced.  My doctor said I should have this baby by the weekend... He said the same thing last week so I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up but I did, of course.

Well after my appointment I immediately started getting contractions & I thought "Yes! Success!" ... Boy, was I wrong?!  Wednesday night & all of Thursday I was experiencing contractions.  There were ones that were as close as 5 minutes apart but not strong or ones every 20 minutes that made me cry.  Until... At 12:41am I began experiencing them every 10 minutes consistently, like clock work.  From 12:41 until 4:41 I was able sleep through most of them except a few woke me up due to their intensity.  After 4:41 they continued to get stronger & stronger yet remained at 10 mins apart. I thought this was it because walking, sitting on my birthing ball & recliner didn't stop them, regardless of what I did, they kept coming. 7:41 came along & they jumped to 8 minutes apart.  The hospital said to come in when they were 5-7 minutes apart so I planned on putting our stuff in the car, getting dressed, waking up Sage & heading to the hospital because I figured they'd just keep getting closer...

I was wrong.  I headed downstairs to put things in the car but I was soooo tired so I laid down on my side & I noticed they were at 11 mins apart, then 12... So I hurried & got up, ran up the stairs & began bouncing on my birthing ball.  They continued to get further apart & weaker & then they stopped. *insert crying emoji here*

This morning since waking up I've gotten them again at 20 mins apart but they aren't very painful.  I give up on trying to speed things along because like so many people say, "she'll come when she's ready..." & I know she will.

Until then I'm not going to go to any extremes... Maybe I'll walk around the house, bounce on my ball occasionally but after the let down this morning, I'm not getting my hopes up until I hit 7 minutes apart consistently for at least an hour.

Tai, please stop teasing us... & if you really want to stay in there please wait until the 23rd so that you'll a Libra because Mommy is an Aquarius & were super compatible lol ;). AND if you do decided to stay that long, please no more false alarms.

xo,

One exhausted momma

38 weeks

 

Houston, we have hit 38 weeks & I'm growing impatient.  I'm beginning to think that my babies just like Heaven too much & that's why they refuse to greet us any earlier.  I don't blame them one bit, there are some pretty amazing family members up there with them. 

We're ready when you are Tai.  Well not literally, I still need to pack my hospital bag... I really shouldn't procrastinate anymore when it comes to packing.  Last Tuesday we had a bit of a scare & I ended up leaving work & creating quite a scene.  All I could think on the way to the hospital was that I still had so much I needed to get done & that I didn't have my bag packed.  This event made Sage & I kick things into gear and the following day we crossed quite a bit of things off our to do list. 

Our home is ready for Tai for the most part but I would prefer for all areas to be situated before she arrives so I don't have to stress about them later when she gets here.  The only things I have to finish up are laundry, which is a never-ending process, and organizing our closet.  I also need to purchase a few things to stick in my hospital bag and then we're set. 

Today is my last day at work so I'll be able to finish these last few things & then wait... I wouldn't say patiently, I'd be lying if I said I haven't been doing some crazy things to induce labor.  Like putting clothes pins on my pinky toes while bouncing on a yoga ball.  Anelia & I have been having dance parties a lot lately too in hopes to bring on labor.  No luck yet, obviously.

Speaking of our gem Anelia, she's doing fabulous.  She is talking non stop & I find us having longer conversations everyday.  She's hilarious... the apple doesn't fall from the tree apparently ;)
I'm very anxious to see how she reacts to Tai but she's talking more & more about her each day.  When I mention that something is for the baby she always says "For Baby Tai!" She's going to be an amazing sister.  I know she may struggle with jealousy or resentment at first but eventually she's going to take on the role as big sister perfectly. 

I probably won't be posting as often as I usually do.  I always blog from work & I don't see myself having much time to do so these next few weeks.  I'm hoping to share her birth story as soon as I can when she arrives, we'll see. 

xo, Ang

September

Is it really September already?  I really feel like this entire year has flown by thus far.  It seems surreal that Tai will be here this month... I can't wait!

How far along? 37 weeks & 4 days

Total weight gain/loss?  Too much... lol!

Maternity clothes? T-shirts & shorts are my go-to outfit.  Comfort is key!

Stretch marks?  When I was pregnant with Anelia I didn't get any stretch marks.  Within the past month I have gotten quite a bit... I'm hoping they'll fade once Tai arrives.

Sleep?  As long as I'm sleeping in our recliner I'm fine for the most part.  My biggest thing is not being able to fall asleep at a decent hour.  Lately the earliest I've been going to sleep is midnight.

Best moment this week?  Considering it's only Monday, nothing has really happened this week but last week was amazing! All thanks to those who threw me a baby shower at work and with family.

Miss Anything?  Being able to hug my hubby without an awkward huge space in-between us.

Movement? Yes, pretty much all day and night.

Food cravings?  Junk... chocolate, chips, etc.

Anything making you queasy or sick? Nope.

Have you started to show yet?  Duh...

Gender? Girl

Labor Signs?  I get contractions occasionally but nothing has been consistent.  With me almost being full term I'm going to try to really make it a point to walk during my breaks at work and sit on my birthing ball more often.

Belly Button in or out?  Completely out, to the point where you can see it through my shirt. It's so lovely- not.

Wedding rings on or off? Still off, I'm looking forward to the day I can put that beauty back on.

Happy or Moody most of the time?  Happy except for when I'm tired or hungry.

Looking forward to?  Delivering this little bundle this month!

blessed with the best

Family has always been a key point in my life.  I thank the Lord for blessing me with such amazing people that I call family, whether we're blood related or not.  This past week I have noticed how truly blessed I am to have such generous, kind, and loving people in my life. 

On Tuesday, the amazing management team at my work set up a surprise potluck for me.  During this potluck they presented me with multiple gift cards that were for very generous amounts that the entire Panorama staff had all put in for.  As cheesy as this sounds- I opened the cards, saw the amounts, and lost it in front of my entire Panorama team.  I know I work with amazing people who are kind but I was so surprised that they all so willing provided me with such an incredible gift.  I especially am thankful for our management staff as I know they are the ones who coordinated everything for me.

When Sage & I met one thing that made me love him even more was his family.  The beauty of the Polynesian community here in Las Vegas is that everyone is like your family, whether you are blood related or not.  Many of the people that Sage's family have introduced me to are like our family, without question.  Yesterday, our Las Vegas family threw us a little baby shower.  It was so nice of them all to take time out of their busy schedules to provide our little family with such a surprise.  Though my family all reside in Salt Lake, I'm beyond grateful for my Las Vegas family who take such great care of my little family and always support us through our journey. 

The Batoon family graciously opened their home to us and threw us an amazing shower.  Everything was perfect!  From the décor, the food, and the games... It was all more than I could have asked for.  My amazing mother-in-law of course helped with many things as well.  I admire Karly and Heavenly so much.  They're such amazing mothers and are always lending a helping hand in everything. 

With the help of all of the amazing people in our lives, we have been given everything we need for our little Tai to make her debut... when's she's ready of course.  I look forward to showing her all of the amazing people we have been blessed with!

"There are friends, there is family, and then there are friends who become family."

one month

Tai's due date is exactly one month away as of today.  Seriously?  This pregnancy has come & gone but I'm noticing that as I become more uncomfortable, the days are passing a little bit more slowly. 

Sage & I still have a lot we need to do & buy.  I didn't realize how much we needed until I made a complete list & let me tell you, it's a long one!  We've got to get our heads on straight & get things moving because Tai will be here before we know it. 

For the past three days now I've been experiencing strong Braxton Hicks to really strong cramping.  Some are so strong that they take my breath away or cause me to freeze up due to the pain.  I never experienced any of this with Anelia, no pain at all until I was in labor.  I'm not going to get my hopes up & say that Tai will be here early but chances are looking more & more likely with each day of contractions.  They haven't been consistent but on Sunday night they were.  For nearly two hours they kept coming & were 5 minutes apart.  Sage was at work & Tai would have been too early so I relaxed, drank lots of water & laid on the my side & things slowly went away, thank goodness.  However, if something like that should happen after my 37th week, I'll definitely try to keep the ball rolling.

As much as I'd love to have Tai be here now, we aren't ready.  Her room isn't ready, furniture isn't where it needs to be, I haven't even got one pack of diapers... yeah, it's THAT bad.  Don't judge.  The list honestly goes on & on.  My "nesting" stage has disappeared but last night I tried to get things together & started washing all of Tai's stuff & setting up her room.  I'm hoping to be very productive these next four weeks so that everything is in place and order when she arrives. 

Aside from the madness of getting things together I am extremely excited for our little baby to make her debut.  I've wanted this for so long & can't wait for Anelia to experience the joys of having a sibling.  I would be lying if I said I wasn't nervous.  My main concern and making sure I continue to show Anelia that she is loved & spend equal time tending to each of my girls' needs.  I know it won't come easy & I know that I'll have my days full of tears & breakdowns... not only from Anelia if you catch my drift.  I'm confident in myself and Sage.  We're a great team and with plenty of prayers and patience, we'll catch onto having two beautiful girls eventually. 

So, let the countdown begin. xo!

home is where the heart is

Our trip back home to Salt Lake was amazing!  It was so nice to be able to see all of our loved ones and my best friends.  Our trip wasn't too eventful, we didn't do anything extremely exciting.  We spent a lot of our time at my sister's relaxing or eating which was absolutely perfect in my book. 

Our first day there we woke up to my nephew Toa in our room.  When Anelia saw him she jumped out of bed and they hugged right away.  It was so precious!  For the most part, Anelia and Toa got along great and spent most of their days playing.  They were two peas in a pod.  On our drive back to Vegas she kept asking for "Toaf." (She calls him Toaf like Olaf from Frozen.) It was a little heart breaking.  It didn't help that she kept asking for him all day yesterday as well.  I know she really enjoyed having all of her cousins around, she doesn't have that here in Vegas.  Thankfully, our Tai will be making her debut & she'll eventually take on the role of Ane's little playmate. 

We ate Kneaders for brunch with my sister Lota and it was delicious, as usual.  May I just add that we are so lucky to always have my sister & her family as our hosts.  They always go above and beyond in making us feel at home.  I can't say enough how thankful I am for them.  Our visits would not be as awesome as they are if it wasn't for them.

Later that evening we had an early dinner with my family at Chuck-a-Rama.  I forgot how much I love Chuck-a-Rama.  I had their mashed potatoes and gravy with lots and lots of rolls but the highlight was their scones with honey butter.  They're seriously to. die. for.  After dinner we made our way back to my sister's with our entire family.  It's always madness with all 10 of the grandkids together but I love it.  It's something that Anelia doesn't get to experience often so I'm all for the chaos as long as they're all having fun.

Wednesday was spent relaxing and getting ready for one of my best friends, Rio's wedding.  This wedding was the main reason that we had made the trip out.  I've known Rio since I was 12 and I could not imagine missing her big day.  Everything turned out beautifully and the wedding was a hit.  It was awesome to see how truly happy Rio is with her husband, Anthony.  They had their wedding at Wheeler Farm which Ane loved.  We took time to walk her around to see all of the animals and she was in complete awe.  We don't see farm animals at all here in Vegas and it was her first time seeing horses and cows up close.  She even got to feed one of the horses, which was priceless.  Luckily, Sage's sister captured that moment.

On Thursday, we spent our day relaxing.  The wedding had taken a lot of my energy & I was so sleepy all day.  However, our day wasn't completely unproductive.  We spent our afternoon outside playing with the kids. 

Funny story time... Sage was playing soccer with my two nieces, Taira & Taleya.  Before I go on, may I just add that I loved watching him & the girls?  He's such a great uncle and he loves my monkeys just as much as I do.  I especially loved seeing him play with them because one day that'll be him with our two girls.  Teaching & playing sports with them, I look forward to experiencing that.  Anyways, back to the story.  Sage was playing around and kicked the ball behind him as my niece Taleya was chasing him.  Well, the ball flew up & knocked Taleya square in the face... It was actually extremely hilarious but she, of course, didn't have the same reaction to this hit as we did.  She immediately broke down in tears & Sage hurried to give her a hug & make sure she was okay.  As many of you know, Taleya has had a "crush" on Sage since the day she met him.  So while he hugged her, she hugged him tightly back & I'm sure she was in heaven lol! 

After their little soccer game, Sage & I loaded all of the kids up in our car & took them to a near by zip line park.  One of the many reasons I love Daybreak (the community my sister lives in) is because there's so much to do with family!  At the park there was so much to do and see.  Most of our time was spent having boat races at a little creek.  Ane didn't participate in the races but she did enjoy placing piles & piles of sand on top of her head, lovely!  That night we all had family dinner at my family's favorite Chinese restaurant, Chin Wah.  We've been going to this place since I was 5 & it's always been extremely delicious!  You can never go wrong with Chin Wah.  Seriously.  If you're reading this & you're in Salt Lake please look it up right now & go.  You won't regret it!

Friday was here before we knew it & there was a dark cloud over Sage & I.  We really were not looking forward to leaving.  It was extremely hard to say goodbye to my family.  Especially because with me having a new baby, I'm not sure when I'll be able to make another trip out to Utah to see them.  All in all, our trip was amazing & I look forward to returning to my hometown with my family of FOUR!

pointing out all of the animals

 

seeing the horses was her favorite part & I don't blame her,

they were beautiful!

my loves

 

isn't she lovely?  my little model

the first photo of all 3 & 1/2 of us

she's such a daddy's girl, love!

moooo!

i felt like the biggest cow of my life with all of my gorgeous best friends.

they're all such beauts & then there was me...

the large, tall & round one haha!

duck lip selfieee

 

the end, xo.

hakuna matata

It means no worries... We had our ultrasound on Thursday and were thrilled to find out that Tai is growing just fine.  It was such a huge weight lifted off my shoulders knowing she's okay.  She's actually more than okay.  They found during the ultrasound that she was weighing in at 5 lbs. 3 oz. which is 1 week AHEAD of schedule.  I love it. 

As previously mentioned, I knew in my heart that everything was fine but it was amazing to get that final confirmation.

I have another doctor's appointment tomorrow before our trip to Utah.  Being the extreme worry wart that I am, I'm so scared my doctor is going to say that I'm dilated (tmi? eh, who cares!) & that I can't go.  But I'm going to push those negative thoughts to the very far back of my head & pretend I never thought of them in the first place...wooosaaahh.

Anyways, I'm extremely excited to go home.  It's been nearly a year since I've been back.  I'm not too fond of the thought of driving for 6 hours but we'll survive.  Poor Sage, he has to do all the driving.  I promise to drive everywhere once we arrive in Salt Lake though so we can make things a little even.

I can't wait to do the following...

1. To see my family & spend a lot of much needed quality time with them. 
2. To see my best friends.  I have been lucky enough to have the same group of best friends as long as 12 years now.  Some ranging as far back as sixth grade and others in my sophomore year of high school.  Regardless, these girls are like my sisters & I'm so thrilled that we'll all be together again.
3. To attend my best friend's wedding.  Rio has always been the one that we all said probably would be the last to get married, sounds blunt but if you ask her, she'd say the same.  Little did we know her prince Anthony, would make her the 4th one to become a Mrs of our group of friends.  I'm so happy for her!
4. To be in South Jordan again.  I love the city where I'm from & I enjoy taking a trip down memory lane each time I'm there.
5. To eat everything that Vegas doesn't have.  Kneaders, Chick-fil-A, Chuck-a-rama & their amazing scones... I could keep going but I'll refrain from doing so because I'm starting to drool.

Well, I'm looking forward to getting off of work & heading home to finish off my large list of "to do's" & getting this show on the road!

xo, Ang

God is good

We weren't able to schedule our ultrasound for Tai until Thursday, August 7th.  These past few days have been going by extremely slow.  I'm so paranoid now when it comes to her.  I panic when I noticed that she isn't as active or I google certain symptoms to make sure things are okay, which at times back fires.  I've been praying more lately asking Heavenly Father for comfort & ease my stress.  With many prayers said, I know in my heart that everything is just fine with our Tai.

Yesterday I had a very neat & touching experience.  Anelia & I ran to Target to get some things for Sage's surprise for our two year anniversary, which is tomorrow.  After doing so, I turned on the car, loaded Anelia in & then began loading my items.  While loading my bags into the car I noticed an elderly lady walking out of the store.  She had a severe hunched back, to the point where her shoulders were at about a 45 degree angle from her hips.  She was carrying a large open bag of popcorn & a small cup of hot coffee.  With each step she took her popcorn and coffee would spill, some of the coffee had even spilled on her.  When I noticed her, she was walking near two other females who I thought were with her & waited to see if they were going to help her.  They both continued right passed her.  As soon as I realized they weren't going to help I rushed to her side and offered to hold her things until she got to her car.  She tilted her head up & I'll never forget how relieved her face looked, she responded by saying "Yes please, thank you!"  After she sat comfortably in the drivers seat she asked "Can I share something with you?"  I then noticed tears streaming from her eyes and said "of course..."  She said "Less than 5 minutes ago I saw a little girl in there. God told me to do something nice for her so I gave her $5. Then as I was walking out here I was thinking how much I needed help & then, just like that, God sent you! See how fast God works?"  I was so pleased to hear that this sweet elderly lady believed God had sent me to help her.  Although I didn't do much, I'm thankful that I was there to assist her in her time of need.  Growing up we were always taught to help those in need, especially our elders.  I don't feel that I did anything special, I just did what I knew was right to do.

With my mind being stressed over the wellbeing of my unborn child I'm thankful that our Heavenly Father brought that little elderly lady across my path.  She brightened my day & eased my mind to know that He is thinking of me & knows my struggle.  I may have helped that elderly lady but she helped me also.  I needed something to make me happier and think positively & she did just that.  I know that our Father in Heaven is mindful of each & every struggle we go through & that he places people in our lives to help lift us when we need it the most.   

Happy Sunday, xo!

say a little prayer...

I had a doctors appointment yesterday.  Usually they're just your basic, "how are you feeling?" & listening to Tai's heartbeat & then measuring me.  This appointment was different this time around. My doctor had a student doctor & he was asked to check Tai's heartbeat.  It took him nearly 10 minutes to find anything & they were the longest 10 minutes of my life.  Eventually my doctor took over & my stress was relieved as soon as I heard her strong heartbeat.

The stress returned shortly after, unfortunately.  My doctor took my measurements & said Tai was measuring small, about 3 weeks behind to be exact.  As a mother, you never want to hear that your child may be different or that something is "wrong" with them.  I began to ask questions & my doctor said not worry & that she would schedule me for an ultrasound.  I schedule the ultrasound tomorrow & I'm extremely anxious to do so.  I try to always remain positive in all situations but this one is wearing on me.  I'd be lying if I said I'm not worried, I just want to know that she's okay.  She continues to kick all day long & with each strong kick she ensures me that she's doing just fine.

After my appointment I called Sage & broke down  My appointments are usually so quick & simple.  This one was scary with not finding her heartbeat at first & then the news that she's measuring small.  It was all too much for me to handle.  I'm thankful for my husband who kept me calm & said that all would be well.  Until the ultrasound, we'll continue to pray that everything will turn out to be perfectly okay & that our princess is growing normally.

xo.

32 weeks & 3 days

52 days days, give or take, our second beautiful blessing will be here!  As I get bigger I'm looking forward to having this gem here already.  I can't complain much though, things in my pregnancy haven't been too bad.

How far along? 32 weeks & 3 days

Total weight gain/loss? 24 lbs. which I'm actually really happy about considering last time I gained over 50 lbs.

Maternity clothes? I always wear maternity clothes to work but at home I basically live in shorts, leggings, t-shirts & tank tops.

Stretch marks? Yes. Not too bad though, about the same amount I got when I was pregnant with Anelia. 

Sleep? Not too bad but not great either.  I have really bad heartburn just like I did with Anelia.  Sage brought our recliner upstairs into our room & it's been a lifesaver!  Tai doesn't like when I sit still so she kicks & moves constantly at night.  I'm hoping her schedule will change when she arrives..

Best moment this week? Anelia kissing my belly & feeling Tai kick like crazy.  She's far more active than I remember Anelia being & she's stronger too.  She has really sharp elbows or knees and occasionally she causes me a lot of pain.

Miss Anything?  Being able to pick up Anelia & hug her tight.

Movement? Yes, she's extremely active.

Food cravings? Watermelon!

Anything making you queasy or sick? Nope.

Have you started to show yet? Of course!

Gender? Girl

Labor Signs?  I find myself getting occasional strong Braxton Hicks when I don't drink enough water.  I'm trying to avoid anything that would cause labor to come soon.  I have a wedding to attend in 2 weeks in Salt Lake.

Belly Button in or out? Not in but not out either, it's just a flat ugly circle. ha!

Wedding rings on or off? Off :(

Happy or Moody most of the time?  Happy with a random mood swing every now & then.  Sage might say differently though.. lol! 

Looking forward to?  Seeing my doctor this week!

see you later's & mini vacations

This past week was pretty eventful, fun, yet sad.  My brother, his wife, & a few of my nieces & nephew were visiting and we got to spend a few days with them.  I love having my family here, I rarely see them so any opportunity I have to spend time with them is something I try to take full advantage of.  We spent a lot of our days last week at my mom's house swimming & letting the kids play.  Anelia loved having her cousins here!  She never has anyone to play with so to see her have so much fun with them was priceless.  However, she & her cousin Tina did get into a few brawls.  It was quite amusing to say the least.

I loved having them here but wasn't very happy on why they were here.  They came to help my mom pack up her house and move back to Salt Lake.  Yep, you read correctly, my mom is moving back home to join the rest of my immediate family. *insert crying face here*  The selfish part of me is so sad to see her go & wants her to stay but at the end of the day, I know she'll be far more happy to be with our entire family. 

She recently got offered a higher paying job and I am so happy for her.  When I moved here seven years ago she made a huge sacrifice for me and quit her job that she had been working at for over 10 years and sold our house.  I could never thank her enough for that.  I was really bummed when she called me & told me that she was going to be moving back.  I held back my negative thoughts and tears because I was happy for her but as soon as we hung up I cried like a baby.  A girl needs her mom, especially when you're pregnant.  But I know she's just a phone call away.  Luckily, we'll be traveling out to Salt Lake in two weeks so saying "see you later" was somewhat easier. 

It's really hard not having my family here.  So hard.  I find myself always wishing I could just drive back to Salt Lake to see them but then I'm reminded about the horrible 6 hour drive that lies between us.  Once I deliver this little princess I'll definitely be purchasing many flights home because I'm not a fan of road trips.  I would take advantage of flying now but per my doctor, no flying for this momma. 

Speaking of road trips, Sage had a bit of vacation he needed to use up so we took a quick trip to the beach with his family.  We went to Crystal Cove in Laguna & it was beautiful.  Sometimes California beaches are a hit or miss but Crystal Cove was such a nice, clean beach.  We enjoyed it.  I didn't go into the water, it was way too cold for my liking.  I'm not much of a beach girl.  I enjoy being at the beach but I'm not a fan of the water.  The apple doesn't fall far from the tree because Anelia is the same way.  She loves swimming but not in the ocean.  I'm sure as she ages that'll change.  I used to love the beach as a kid. 

Ultimately, aside from having to see my mom go, this week was a lot of fun & I'm glad that we were able to spend quality time with both sides of our family. 

xo, Ang

seven years strong

Sage & I make seven years of being together tomorrow, July 15th.  I can't believe how fast time has flown by over the years but I'm proud of where time has taken us and that we have become what we have.  After seven years of being together we had a beautiful daughter who means everything & more to us, we became husband and wife, Sage has begun his lifelong career, we have another beautiful blessing on the way, we have a nice home to rest our heads and make memories in, a nice vehicle that allows us to get to where we need to comfortably... We have built a wonderful foundation for our growing family and we've done all of this TOGETHER.  I'm so proud of us and how far we've come. 

I knew of Sage because he played football with my cousin Sam.  Sage & I met very briefly on New Years Eve when I was 16 while I was visiting family in Vegas.  At that time neither of us were interested.  It may have been the fact that Sage was nearly 2 feet shorter than me.  It wasn't until I moved to Vegas in the summer of 2007 that we really got to know one another and made things official.  At seventeen I didn't think I was going to marry Sage, I just knew I liked him and that he was basically my only friend in the entire city lol.  It wasn't until I was nineteen that I knew this man was who I wanted to be with.  Sage has always been a behind the scenes romantic and full time comedian.  His jokes and sentimental gestures are what won me over.  To this day he continues to surprise me with little love letters or makes gestures to let me know that he cares & loves me.

Some may argue that we haven't been together since this date because we had a few "breaks" in between.  Just like any young, teenage couple we had our differences, ended things on a daily, weekly, or monthly basis due to selfishness and immaturity.  As we aged things became better &  ultimately, what's most important is that no matter how broken our relationship- we built from the bottom and let go of what we couldn't change. We focused on building a better future with and for one another.  Not all high school sweethearts can say they made it as far as us, I'm thankful that we pushed through the trials because they only made us stronger. 

I know I mention this a lot but I am truly thankful for Sage.  Without him, I would most definitely be lost.  I don't know where I'd be & don't want to even fathom the thought because life wouldn't be as wonderful or exciting if it wasn't for my handsome, hard working, kind, hilarious, sweet husband.  I'll love him forever and look forward to all that we have in store for us and our family in the future.

Here's to many more years of growing, learning, and building together!

29 weeks & 3 days

I was going through our old blog & came across my posts from my last pregnancy.  I'm so glad that I kept track of my last pregnancy & documented how I was feeling.  As I previously mentioned in my last post, it's funny what you forget about pregnancy once your baby arrives.  I was reminded about many things & around what time certain things started happening to me while pregnant with Anelia.

This past weekend I spent sometime cleaning, doing laundry & trying to organize my mess of a house.  At 29 weeks last time I had the urge to nest but I state that I never actually started because it was too "early."  This time around is definitely not too early.  We have a 3 bedroom, 3 bathroom home & I have a toddler who is a walking tornado so I have started nesting.  I was really looking forward to when I'd hit this point because my house has been a serious mess.  I still have a whole lot to complete and do but I definitely feel up to take care of it all. 

I mention in one that my legs & feet started to swell around 30 weeks.  I'm glad I mentioned this because I am going to try to prevent this from happening again this time around.  I know certain things to avoid and to do so hopefully I won't end up with sausage toes & kankles this time around.

I haven't been experiencing anything crazy or different than the usual lately.  Heartburn, occasional backache, etc.  I'm currently at work & wishing I was home so I could be nesting & getting things ready.  I'm even having the urge to clean & organize here at work, I'm going crazy!  I'm hoping I remain this way for as long possible because I have so much I need to do.  I'm constantly making "To Do" lists at work of things I want to complete when I get home. 

Well here's to preparing for our sweet Tai to make her debut in 10 short weeks.  Let's hope they fly by but not too quickly so I can get everything done.

xo, Ang

who doesn't love surprises

It's funny how after you have your baby you completely forget all the negatives you dealt with during your pregnancy.  For example, I completely forgot how badly I had heartburn and how terribly my back felt during my pregnancy with Anelia.  Now that I am experiencing those things again, I am fully reminded. 

My back pain has been the biggest issue of this pregnancy at this point.  It's terrible.  I have never been so uncomfortable in my life, not even in my last pregnancy.  I've been trying to do stretches daily to ease the pain but at times nothing seems to help. 

Yesterday the pain was endless, I couldn't sit up or walk without constant pain.  My sweet Sage must have seen that I was really hurting because he decided to surprise me with a one hour prenatal massage at Green Valley Ranch Resort Spa.  Just out of the goodness of his heart & I didn't even ask for it.  However, I have mentioned getting one later on & closer to my due date but he obviously saw that I needed one now. 

Funny side story:  When he told me that he had set up a massage for me, he called it a "paternity" massage... haha!  I also did not believe him whatsoever because Sage is quite the jokester.  I often can't tell if he's being serious or joking.  It took him showing me his call history to know that he wasn't lying and that he really did set everything up for me. 

The spa at GVR was gorgeous!  It was my first time ever going somewhere so fancy for a treatment and it's something I'll never forget.  They had a steam room, sauna, multiple Jacuzzis, fully loaded hair stations, and a bar with plenty of delicious snacks and drinks.  It was heavenly.  Although, I will admit that I would have loved for Sage to be there to share in the experience.  I usually enjoy myself more when I have someone there with me to experience it all as well.  I told Sage that next time we have to do a couples massage & go together. 

I'm so very thankful that I have been blessed with Sage.  We hit our 7 years anniversary on the 15th of this month and I don't know how I got so lucky.  Just like any other relationship we have our days where we don't get along too well or it's best for us to keep our distance but for the most part, majority of the time, he & I get along perfectly and we love each other's company.  I love him & I can't say enough how grateful I am that he's been in my life for 7 years!

third trimester

We have happily hit the third trimester!  I can't believe how fast time has gone by.  I'm going to enjoy it while it lasts because I know that once I hit a certain point time will drag and I'll want Tai to be here right away.  I can't say enough how excited I am to have our sweet baby girl here.  Last night she was kicking up a storm and elbowing me like crazy, I loved every second of it.

I'm mostly looking forward to Anelia being a big sister.  I know I've expressed this before but I can't say enough how excited I am to see her reaction to her sister.  Yesterday we had the honor of attending Sage's cousin's baby shower and I got to see Ezra.  As I was holding Ezra, Ane began to act out and wasn't too pleased.  Needless to say, she was jealous.  I know we'll have our moments like that when Tai gets here but I hope to overcome them.  I never want Anelia to feel any less special when Tai makes her arrival.  I think that's what I'm most nervous for.  But I know it will all work out the way it should.  Optimism is key!

That's all for now. 

xo, Ang

little update

It's been awhile since I've provided a little update about our little family & how we're doing.

Sage continues to work long grave shift hours, I don't know how he does it sometimes.  He never seizes to amaze me.  Father's Day is coming up and I'm hoping that Anelia and I can make this one special and relaxing after all of his constant hard work for our little family.  I've already set up a nice little "stay-cation" for us at Green Valley Ranch Resort.  Sage & I have stayed there multiple times before and we love it.  The pool is amazing & definitely something I'm looking forward to with Ane.  They have a sand area that I know she's going to love.  Hopefully Sage enjoys himself and his Father's Day weekend, I'm looking forward to seeing him relax, he deserves it!

Anelia continues to grow both physically and mentally.  She's actually getting quite tall, I don't know where she would get that from?!  She's also getting a little heavy which makes it hard for this prego momma.  Everyday after we shower I'll wrap her towel around her and ask her to walk.  She always looks up at me & says "pweeeeease?"  Since she was a little baby I've always picked up her up after wrapping her up in her towel & then have her make silly faces with me in the mirror.  We've done this for as long as she can probably remember and requires it every.single.time after we shower.  Lifting her is definitely a task but since it's a tradition I just can't let her down.  Who could say no to a darling face like hers? 

Story time, yesterday, I was in our walk-in closet with the door closed and Sage was in our bathroom.  Anelia came in & goes "Where's mommy?"  Sage responded and said "I don't know where is she?"  Ane then left the room and went & checked her room then Tai's room and I could hear her saying "Where are they?  Where's mommy?  Where's Tai?...Tai? Mommy?"  *heart melted* I hadn't mentioned Tai at all yesterday & Sage asked "Have you been talking about Tai a lot today?"  I don't know if she quite understands who Tai is but she knows that when Mommy points to her belly, that's Tai & a baby.  She's getting so smart and I think we often underestimate all that she knows.

I have hit 25 weeks and 2 days in my pregnancy.  I can't believe that it's already June.  This pregnancy has flown by so quickly; in less than 2 weeks we'll be in our final trimester.  I'm so looking forward to having my baby girl here.  Although, I will admit I am trying to enjoy every moment I have with my Anelia.  I can't believe that soon she won't be our only baby.  With the heat getting higher & higher I am noticing a little bit of swelling in my hands and feet.  This was one of the worst parts of my pregnancy with Anelia so I'm trying to do all that I can to prevent it this time around. 

Our family as a whole is doing great!  We purchased a new car since Lucy died on us... RIP.  It's a red Toyota Venza and Sage is loving it.  He recently had the rims plasti-dipped with black and it turned out nicely.  It's the perfect car for our growing family right now.

My dad recently got a job in Salt Lake so my mom & I are yet again, the only ones in our family in a different state.  She & I were that only ones in Utah for a long time and now the tables have turned.  This time we don't live together though so I'm trying to do as much as possible together so she's not too lonely.  Tonight we're going to dinner before she heads to Florida for a business trip.  I'm definitely missing Utah a lot lately & our family there.  Summer is always a time that I usually go back but this year I have to wait and save my time off since I'll be on maternity leave in September.

Well, that's the update for now. 

xo, Ang

blessings in a huge disguise

The month of May is always a challenging one for me.  I'm constantly reminded about how drastically my life changed in the month of May in 2007.  It was the hardest time of my life.  I went through a whirlwind of heartache, depression, paranoia... you name it, I felt it. 

I often look back at what I went through at the young age of seventeen and am amazed that I'm still here.  Honestly.  The days were dark, however, they didn't remain that way.  There is a "happily ever after" to my story. 

First and foremost, my intentions aren't to reopen a can of worms by writing this or look for sympathy.  I don't want to offend anyone but I have been doing a lot of reflecting and feel that I deserve to share this journey and where it's taken me seven years later.  If you feel you're going to be offended, stop reading, it's simple.

On May 21, 2007 I lost my Grandpa Halatoa.  I had never lost a family member in my life and this loss hit hard.  It wasn't easy and I miss my sweet Grandpa everyday, as well as my Grandad Elbert.  A few days after dealing with such a great loss I experienced something that I won't go into detail about but it was easily the worst night of my life that lead to years of struggle, hurt & fear.

For years, I didn't think I would be able to overcome what I experienced.  It was much harder being that this was the second time this had happened to me.  I dealt with horrible paranoia and constant fear.  I would often spend nights sobbing while saying a prayer asking the Lord why he chose me to deal with such a trial.  After what had happened to me I didn't feel safe in my own house, the city that I grew up in, or the state that I spent my entire life.  Home wasn't home for me anymore, so I left.  I moved to Las Vegas. 

Deciding to move wasn't easy and it affected myself and my family in a large way.  I had to leave all of my friends whom I grew up with, leave my school at the end of my junior year and begin my senior year with zero friends at my new school.  My parents had to sell their gorgeous dream home that my family shared so many beautiful memories in.  My mom had to quit her job and relocate to Vegas with me. 

Moving to Las Vegas wasn't an automatic fix to my problems; I remained scared but with the help and support of my amazing family, I eventually overcame a lot of my fears.  My sister Lota and my parents supported me through my fears, prayed for me, and were my shoulder to cry on through the darkest of times.  I am forever thankful for them and how they never forced me to forgive, they allowed me to face this demon when I wanted to and on my time. 

I was able to meet a lot of great people after moving here, each one played a purpose in helping me recover and get over what I dealt with.  One of those people being Sage.  He played a large role in my happiness, he helped keep my mind away from the whole thing.  He was also my only friend at my new school and introduced me to a lot of people.  He was my little distraction and when I told him what had happened to me he helped me feel protected and loved.

That is where my "happily ever after" comes in.  With Sage and I expecting another baby, I have been thinking about how far I've come since May of 2007.  Seven years is a long time and I can say in those seven years, I learned many things throughout these years.  I overcame hate, learned to forgive yet never forget, and trust in the Lord.  Without the guidance and help of my Father in Heaven I wouldn't be here.  I made it through the darkness thanks to all of the light that my family, husband and my daughters bring me. 

They are what keep me sane and they are my happily ever after.  If I would have told my seventeen year old self that what I experienced was kind of like a blessing in disguise, I would have called myself crazy.  But when I take a step back and take a look from the outside looking in, it's true.  I hate that I had to deal with what I did and that others had to experience dark times because of what happened but eventually, the dark fades and the sun comes out and each day becomes a little easier.

Moving to Las Vegas has been a true blessing.  If I wouldn't have I wouldn't have met Sage, we wouldn't have become best friends, we wouldn't have gotten married, and most importantly, we wouldn't have had a two incredible blessings, our daughters.  What I dealt with made me into who I am today, it brought me what I have and although, I wouldn't want to experience that night again, I'm strangely thankful that it led me to where I am and most importantly to who I have.

priceless moments

Being a mom has allowed me to experience moments that are truly priceless.  Hearing your baby cry for the first time, seeing their sweet smile, watching grow & learn new things, having them say "I love you" for the first time, thanks to my sweet princesses, I have experienced so many beautiful, heart warming moments.  I'll cherish each one forever,

I try my hardest to keep record of the many amazing things my babies do.  Whether it be a note in my phone or by taking a picture or posting a blog, I try to document these priceless moments.

Tonight, I witnessed one of these moments & I immediately had to jump on here to document it.  Anelia & I were laying in bed & I noticed Tai was kicking.  So I put my hand on my belly & then thought "let me see how Ane will react to this..."  I grabbed Ane's hand & pressed it into my belly where Tai was kicking.  Tai stopped kicking so I told Ane "Tell Tai to say hi!" Ane then said "Hi Tai!" & pushed her hand into my belly harder.  I've never felt Tai kick so much until that very moment.  Ane felt the kicks & started laughing & pressing into my belly to feel more kicks.  As I'm typing this blog, Anelia has her hand placed on my belly, patiently waiting to feel her sister kick.

I can't wait until Tai's movements are much stronger, Ane is going to love it!  I'm so glad that she is slowly starting to really understand that I have a baby in my belly.  I can't wait for her to experience the joy of having a sister.

I love these gems with all of me & thanks to them I get to celebrate Mother's Day!  I'm one blessed mommy & it's all thanks to them!

whoaaa, we're half way there

You must sing the title to the tune of "Livin' on a Prayer" by Bon Jovi ;)

Indeed, we're half way there.  I hit 20 weeks on May 2nd.  It's actually gone by pretty quickly and I feel myself slowly wanting to start nesting.  I almost feel like it might be a little early to start doing that but you can never be too prepared.

I felt Tai move for the first time around 17 weeks and on May 4th I felt her with my hand from the outside for the first time.  She still is pretty small so it was a very small movement but feeling your baby move is my favorite part about pregnancy.  I can't wait for her to continue to grow healthy and strong & look forward to those big kicks and movements.

We still aren't sure what her middle name is going to be.  Since her first and last name are so short we want a long Polynesian middle name.  I'm sure we'll find the perfect name soon, in due time. 

September 20th can't come soon enough, I look forward to having our sweet girl here.

locked out

Sometime last week, Sage & I worked together to make some delicious chicken, sausage, mushroom & shrimp skewers.  Sage was so excited to make these.  He went out and bought a little grill and was so proud once he got the little thing together.  Typical man for you. 

The grill was small and about a foot above the ground.  Ane did fine at first with the grill being in the backyard, we mostly kept her occupied with some sidewalk chalk.  Eventually she became too comfortable and kept going near the grill so we decided she needed to go in the house while we finished up.  Our family room is right inside our sliding door to the backyard so she was in our view. 

She wasn't pleased that we kept her inside & when we turned our backs to finish up, the lights went out.  We both just laughed that she turned the lights out on us and continued our work.  We finished with the skewers and Sage went to open the door and to our surprise, it was locked.  Yup, our two year old locked us out. 

At first it was funny, then the panic set in and I was knocking on the door for Ane to open it.  She then began to panic too and was crying for us to come in.  Luckily, Sage had his phone on him so he was able to call his family to bring us our spare key.  They live just down the street so it was very convenient to say the least. 

Sage's sister arrived and I'm sure what she found was priceless.  Anelia crying next to the sliding door, Sage & I standing outside in the backyard, in the dark.  Priceless.

The moral of the story?  Never underestimate the power of your two year old.  

Aunt "Three"

My Great Aunt Marie Van Sickle passed away last week, unfortunately.  She was one of the sweetest tender souls I have ever come across.  This loss was not easy but it was most difficult because I got to witness how it badly it effected my mom.  Seeing our loved ones deal with a significant loss is never an easy task.  It broke my heart to see my mom so broken.  She may have been broken from the loss but she spoke such wonderful, kind words in honor of my Aunt Marie at her funeral service.  One thing that I'll always remember is that my mom used to refer to Aunt Marie as Aunt Three while growing up because she couldn't pronounce her name properly.    

 

With us living in Salt Lake and Las Vegas all of my life I only came in contact with my Aunt Marie a few times.  I will never forget how sweet she was to me.  She was full of compliments and kind words always.  She was beautiful on the inside and out.  She also was very loyal to her husband, Van & that's something I admire her for.  They were soul mates and they spent many of their years together traveling across the country and square dancing in competitions. 

 

My Aunt Marie did not have kids of her own so she spoiled my mom & her siblings quite a bit.  They were her only nieces and nephews.  She also left behind her sister, Hazel.  My Great Aunt Hazel has dementia but she doesn't suffer from it.  She's one of the most happy, cheerful elderly people I have ever come in contact with.  She's the sweetest thing.  She approaches everyone as if they're her best friend and when it's time to go she lets you know she loves you without hesitation.  She only remembers a few people, of course, those she's been around her entire life like my Aunt Marie and my Grandad, Elbert, who has also passed.  My Aunt Hazel will be moving to Salt Lake and I'm so envious of my siblings.  I would love to able to have dinner with her occasionally at her care center.  She kept us laughing the entire time we were there with her hilarious jokes.  She even mentioned that she wanted to go skinny dipping at my aunt's hotel pool!  

 

It was so nice to see so many of my family members from my mom's side that I haven't seen in years.  I was also so thrilled to be able to spend time with my siblings and some of my little monkeys.  It's never easy living so far from my loved ones, it's extremely hard at times.  I loved being able to spend time with my siblings, even if we didn't do much.  You don't need to do fun, exciting things when you're around my family, just them, being them, is fun & exciting enough.  I miss them already & look forward to August when I can see them all again!

 

My amazing parents & Anelia before going into the viewing.

 

Throughout the viewing Aunt Hazel would get up & go speak with her sister.

It definitely pulled your heart strings. 

Aunt Hazel was the first to place a rose on Aunt Marie's casket.

 

She's such a charecter.  She was singing

"Let it Go" in the parking lot, with the hand motions and all.

Litte poser

My best friends since day one, my siblings. Love them!

Tina, myself, John & Lota

Miss Thang heading out of our hotel,

she was ready to get back to Vegas.

 

#BecauseOfHim

Because of Him, I had the honor and privilege to share another beautiful Easter with my little family.  Each Holiday is always such a fun time, especially with Anelia.  Her face was priceless the morning she found her basket.  She came down the stairs and gasped, "Wow, amazing!"  After watching Frozen one too many times, amazing is one of her new favorite words.  I'm blessed with the absolute best #BecauseOfHim & for that, I am forever thankful.

 

Anelia's basket(s) to the left & Sage's stuff to the right.

The little card tell him that he didn't get much because I cleaned the house lol!

Our big girl was able to do her own egg hunt this year.  This was probably the highlight of my day, although, it was rough seeing her not make it to certain eggs as fast as the other kids.  She didn't mind though, she enjoyed it & that's all that matters.

is it thanksgiving?

Typing in that caption really made me crave some good Thanksgiving dinner.  Mmm, doesn't some turkey, mashed potatoes with gravy and cranberry sauce on a warm roll sound amazing?  Okay but really...

I don't know if it's something in the air or what but I've been feeling especially grateful for all that I have.  I try not to forget the blessings I am surrounded by, every. single. day.  We do have bumps in our road like good ol' tax season, when Uncle Sam likes to take our hard earned money.  Or how my little Lucy, the car that I've had since I was 15 has broken down.  Those things bring challenge and grief but are things that I try to overlook.  Just little bumps in the road, something that we eventually overcome. 

I know I mention how blessed we are quite often but I do feel incredibly blessed.  Although I've never personally bought a lottery ticket for myself, I've always said I would never win because I've already hit the jackpot. 

I have an incredible husband who works long, grueling hours to support our little family.  He rarely complains and serves us with a smile.  He's truly my best friend and the nights that he isn't with us are gloomy.  He is one person who can make me happy just by being there.  Our relationship has never been easy and we've hit our mountains but we've climbed them together.  That's the beauty of struggle, once you reach the top of the mountain you get to enjoy the beautiful view.

Anelia is someone that I get emotional just thinking about.  That sounds terribly cliche but she is the apple of my eye and I love her sweet soul so very much.  The past two Saturday's she has been going with her Grandma Nua to watch her Uncle Derick's football games.  I find myself so bored while she's gone.  She brings so much entertainment, joy, and number of other things into our lives.  With her growing up so quickly and gaining her independence I cherish the times she shows me she needs me.  This moring she woke up while I was getting ready and wouldn't go back to sleep without holding my hand.  She had tears streaming down her little chubby cheeks and I began to cry with her.  Dramatic?  Yes, maybe but I didn't get a good night's rest, I'm pregnant and I'm human, cut me a little slack please?  Gracias.  Anyways, it's never easy leaving her & I look forward to heading home to see her every day.

I haven't personally met my little Tai but I occasionally feel her kick.  Thus far she's kept me on my toes, she's provided me with a very unpredictable pregnancy & surprises me each & everyday.  I can't wait to have her here, to hold her.  I long for a newborn, I know she's going to keep me busy but I'm up for the challenge.  Bring it on baby girl! 

Having a little family of my own has shown me how those who truly matter will remain in your life.  In high school, my family would always say "Friends come and go but Family is forever!"  That saying is so true.  I do have a few friends that I'm so glad to still have be apart of my little family's lives.  However, my family, including my in-laws who have become my own over the years, are who truly matter and have helped us in all of our times of need.  I can't say enough how thankful I am for them all & their love. 

I guess you could say I am feeling very thankful this beautiful Sunday morning.  God is good!

Tai Nua

On April 9th we found out that our Tai is a sweet little baby girl!  

 

 

She tricked us all, after experiencing a whole different kind of pregnancy this time around I was so certain that Tai was a boy but to our surprise, we will be welcoming another princess into our family come September!

 

Sage's family & my parents were all present during the announcement of Tai being a girl.  I'm so thankful that they were all there to share in the exciting moment.  All of my siblings and majority of my close friends are all in Salt Lake so to have the few of them there, meant so much. 

We all somewhat hopped for a boy, especially Sage.  Within the first seconds of our ultrasound the tech had gone in between Tai's legs & I knew that she, was not a little he.  Once she confirmed that Tai was a girl I cried tears of joy, excitement, & a little bit of sadness.  I know that sounds horrible but I felt so bad for Sage.  He wanted a son so badly, so badly in fact that I could have sworn when we got in the car to leave, I began to cry more & I looked over to see him holding back tears.  It's a good thing he doesn't read our blog because he'd kill if he saw that I wrote that.

That night we went home & the sad moods continued.  But the next morning we found ourselves excited to be welcoming another beautiful little princess into our family.  Anelia is such a joy, she's perfect in every way in our eyes & I can't wait to see what Tai is like.  I'm guessing she'll be quite different from her sister considering the trouble she's given me this far in my pregnancy, little stinker.

I look forward to watching my girls grow up together.  Having two older sisters myself, I cherish all of our memories that we have shared.  They're my best friends & have guided me through many of my trials.  I look forward to watching Anelia guide Tai & being a great example.  I can't wait to see what adventures the two of them will get into.  They'll be eachother's first best friend, what a pleasure it will be to witness.

Ultimately, Sage & I are thrilled that we will be having another healthy little blessing!  We wanted another baby, boy or girl & Tai is exactly what The Lord intended for us to have.  I am 17 weeks today & I am so grateful to our Father in Heaven for providing us with another girl.  I know that there are so many people out there that are unable to experience the incredible blessing of parenthood. So although we were a bit "thrown off" by the news of Tai being a girl, we ARE thrilled to be have her.

"Parenthood is a sacred privilege and depending on the faithfulness it can be an eternal blessing" - Boyd K Packer.

Here's to being a parent of not just one but two beautiful girls!  May they be easy on us when they're teens... *sigh*

xo, Ang